We’ve all seen numerous clips of the grade-schooler who was handcuffed by police to put an end to her school temper tantrum. The tape shows the child systematically and defiantly wrecking the administrator’s office and captures her histrionics as three police officers arrive and restrain her. It is these few seconds of activity which form the basis of the countless replays we’ve seen on our TV screens, which have brought innumerable demands to judge the case on the activity of police taken out of context.
This incident is but one of many which have recently been reported in the media which seem to take delight in judging the actions of schools and police as inappropriate. Many speak as if temper tantrums should be accepted as normal phases of a child’s emotional growth which can always be corrected by calm and reasoned talk. The widespread reporting of similar incidents and accounts of an increasing amount of violence against educators nationwide are an alarming indication of a lack of proper child-rearing practices in our country.
Two unfortunate things are happening to children today. Firstly, parents are abdicating their responsibility for “training up a child in the way he should go” (Proverbs 22:6). Troubled children like the little girl who featured in the recent news reports, often come from broken homes or single-parent families where, because they lack normal home environment, it is difficult for them to receive proper discipline. It is virtually impossible for such a home to follow the biblical injunction: “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:1).
What of the ancient principle: “These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates” (Deuteronomy 6:7-9)? Are parents impressing Godly principles into their children’s minds?
God upholds the dignity of parents when He commands that “If there is anyone who curses his father or his mother, he shall surely be put to death” (Leviticus 20:9). One sees TV reality shows where children think nothing of striking their parents because they have never been punished for doing so! Parents appear to feel helpless in the face of their children’s rages and allow them to do whatever they want. Such a path contributes to the incidents of child violence against adults and authority figures now being reported in the media.
Secondly, parents refuse to allow schools to apply any form of corporal discipline fearing that their children will be traumatized by it. Our Maker did not, however, design children so that they would be damaged by a little correction when they stray from the paths of proper behavior, otherwise He would not have said: “The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child who gets his own way brings shame to his mother” (Proverbs 29:15). Why do you think our little TV star achieved notoriety by acting out and getting restrained by police? Who should bare the shame?
Bad parenting, overzealous legal action for vast sums of money, and the support of psychologists who have tried for decades to bully parents into not properly disciplining their children have produced a generation with a large number of out-of-control children. Teaching is now fraught with danger for educators and our children’s education is suffering as a consequence.
We need to ensure that we give our children, of whatever age, firm control, and the principles of right behavior. These principles must be instilled by parents who provide a stable and loving environment and are willing to make children adhere to them by discipline, even when that takes a physical form. When our children go to school they should be well-mannered and respectful so that they can have a fulfilling educational experience.
We as Christian parents must make sure our children can look to us for sound discipline in a loving home which will fit them for a stable place in a sound society.